Mitzi Moments

Category: end of days

bullies in blue…

By on February 7, 2011 in end of days, made for the maury show, tapped out

I was searching the internet for one of the commercials that aired during the Super Bowl Last night- you know, the one that ends with the black woman throwing something at her boyfriend but it actually hits the white girl in the head. And when blondie falls out, the two of them run off together? OMG, that commercial was so funny, I woke up with a smile on my face. Unfortunatley, came across this video instead.

Um, yeah. Let’s just say I’m not laughing anymore.

Not for nothing, this ‘ish is crazy. Not only did they hit the kid with a patrol car but they beat fire out of him. For ATTEMPTED robbery? WOW.

I mean, not saying the lil’ dude is in the right. Criminal activity is criminal activity. But not for nothing, this is the kinda ass whooping somebody should’ve given Bernie Madoff or how about the white kid that shot up all those folks in Arizona??

*shrug*

I’m just saying.

sticks, stones and a crackho…

By on February 1, 2011 in end of days, keep hope alive, pocket full of dirty tissue, supermarket dreams on a bodega budget, tagging out, why we as a people can't get ahead

Ok, while you’re playing, this Mayoral race in Chicago is DEAD SERIOUS.

O.M.G!

Shout out to my girl Leah, for putting me up on this news report from a recent candidate debate where former Senator Carol Moseley Braun goes all the way, and I do mean, ALLA WAY IN on a fellow candidate Patricia Van Pelt Watkins.


See, now if folks started telling the truth like this is NYC, Bloomberg’s shady ass wouldn’t even be in office right now. Real talk.

BLANK STARE w 3 LOONG BLINKS.

Lord forgive me but I cannot wait until Rahm Emmanuel has his turn at the mic.

*grabs the bowl of popcorn and pulls up a chair*

parenting isn’t for everybody…

By on January 28, 2011 in desperate cry for help, end of days, it's not a game out there, made for the maury show, pocket full of dirty tissue, tapped out

Let me get this straight. A 13-month old baby drowns in the bathtub while his mother is checking her friends’ status updates and playing CafeWorld on Facebook? Forreal?


When I initially saw this story, I almost refused to click link. And quite honestly, I’m sorry that I went against my gut. Cause now I’m physically ill.

Not only did this little boy drown because of his mother’s irresponsibility and lack of good judgement but wait on it… This ignorant hooker has the nerve to try and justify her actions??

Talking about, “he wanted to be left alone.”

HUH? He, who? Since when can a one year old tell an adult ANYTHING??? Let alone, give me privacy while I bathe.

BLANK STARE

This tragedy was so senseless and preventable it’s just… BEYOND.

facebook is the devil…

By on January 26, 2011 in end of days, keep hope alive, made for the maury show, tapped out, work it white girl

And in other loosey goosey white woman news:


Two cousins from Long Island, Melanie Spanopoulos and Giselle Penagos, got into a disagreement over a dude who accepted one chick’s Facebook friend request yet denied the other cousin.

As if even having an argument over a Facebook friend request isn’t petty enough, when Giselle (the denied female) found out that her cousin’s request had been accepted, she caught an attitude and refused to get into a car with Melanie. Well, turns out Melanie wasn’t having it. So this moron proceeded to hit her cousin with her van- TWO TIMES.

(Clearly one time wasn’t enough. Homegirl needed to put the vehicle in reverse and run that ass over again to make her point. )

Long story short, poor Giselle required surgery Monday to fix a broken leg and shattered pelvis.

BLANK STARE

Just so we’re all clear, this crazy bish ran over and then reversed a freaking VAN on top of her own flesh and blood b/c of some dude’s FB friend selection?

*logs all the way off*

calling all balloon heads…

By on January 26, 2011 in end of days, pocket full of dirty tissue, team obama, why we as a people can't get ahead



This video is priceless.

It physically pains that someone with this little knowledge of our country’s history is in a position to make decisions for the entire nation. Michele Bauchman reminds me of all the white people I know that still think and openly say things like, “Oh Mitzi, you’re so different from the rest of those Black people.”

BLANK STARE

now is the time to call 911…

By on January 14, 2011 in end of days, made for the maury show, why we as a people can't get ahead

It’s funny, because as a single woman, I’m frequented being asked what I look in a mate. And naturally, here are a lot of qualities that I hope that my life partner will possess. But after watching this video, I gotta tell you the order of that theoretical list IMMEDIATELY become revised and now has a non-negotiable number one:


SOCIALLY RESPONSIBLE.

YO, how in the WORLD does anyone in their right mind drive by an unsupervised toddler waddling down the sidewalk EVER???? And the baby was ONLY wearing a pair of diapers in the f’king SNOW???

BLANK STARE w/ MOUTH COMPLETELY AJAR

Ya’ll these dudes are beyond foul and selfish. And their sick, voyeuristic ability to enjoy witnessing what is clearly a cry of help and not get involved is just…

This is exactly what I meant when I say, as embarrassed as that pre-teen might have TEMPORARILY felt getting whupped up on by his Uncle, at LEAST somebody cared enough to jump in and get involved when he was endangering his life (And yes, posting pictures of yourself pretending to be a drug dealing gang member and making terrorist death treats on the internet where nothing ever disappears IS endangering your life).

This seriously reminds me of the type of people that stand around and video tape a woman being gang raped. But in that case, at least the cowards can claim that they might of been scared for their own safety. This is a BABY on a deserted street in a clearly blighted area of town.

I really hope all the men laughing in that car face criminal charges for their depraved indifference.

*drops the mic and walks away*

don’t call me, i’ll find you…

By on January 12, 2011 in end of days, it's not a game out there, tagging out

Oh yeah, I want to put everyone up on this website, spokeo.com.


A modern day national address book of sort, this new service has basically compiled all the public data available on everyone and created individual user profiles. Which in theory should be no worse than the white pages (remember those?)

Except, these profiles include EXTREMELY personal information. Mm-hmm… Think your marital status, lists of your relative and how they’re related to you, your occupation and bio, an estimation of your annual income, photos & videos from sever social networking site you’ve belonged to like Myspace (remember THAT??)/ FB/Linkedin, hobbies, etc.


DEAD FISH EYES

So essentially, for a nominal fee of course, any wacko in the world with internet access can find out how much they think you make a year, who your favorite aunt is, where she lives and even get a Google picture of her front door.

You do the math.

I suggest you log on, find your profile, copy the URL, click on the Privacy link at the bottom of the page and get to opting out IMMEDIATELY.

RANDOM SIDENOTE: I mentioned the site to one of my homegirls yesterday. And do you know, that shady hooker replied, “Oh yeah, I heard about that last week. I figured you knew. I already removed myself.” Uh, she thought I knew??? myBFFsaintish.com

one spoonful at a time…

By on January 7, 2011 in end of days, keep hope alive, Mitzi- all day every day, tagging out


First the blackbirds fell outta the sky in Arkansas. Next, tens of thousands of fish washed up on shores from Maryland to Brazil. Then even MORE birds fell out of the sky and a mass of crabs washed up on the beaches of the UK. And now, just when government officials have finally concocted a half-way plausible global-warming excuse for all these unexplainable “natural disasters,” a healthy sow just delivered a TWO-HEADED calf in the country of Georgia.


SILENCE.

*starts digging underground fallout shelter with a spoon*

another sad broke song…

By on January 5, 2011 in end of days, it ain't easy, pocket full of dirty tissue, supermarket dreams on a bodega budget

Uuugh… Toni Braxton is seriously considering posing for a Playboy cover to raise funds to cover the $50 million dollar debt that she’s in???


BLANK STARE

Uh Toni? Forreal?

Not to be funny but, even someone with an accounting degree from Devry can figure out the measy couple of million dollars you’d receive-IF, and I do mean IF Hef is willing to pay washed-up, 43 year-old R&B singers two million dollars to get sorta nekkid (cause she talking only T&A, not complete nudity) ain’t gonna make nary a dent in that riduculous bankruptcy situation you got going on. AGAIN.

*rolls eyes all the way back in head*

Instead of calling Hef, your ass NEEDS to be stalking Babyface and begging him to write a song for you. Shooot….

why is she a 26 year-old senior…

By on December 22, 2010 in end of days, made for the maury show, tagging out, work it white girl

In this week’s swept-under-the-rug news, this past Sunday the Ithaca Police Department snatched up 26 year-old Cornell senior, Keri Lynn Blakinger in some local hotel parking lot holding nearly SIX ounces of UNCUT heroin!!

BLANK STARE w/ 3 LOONG BLINKS

Um,what in the over-educated, no commonsense having, delusions of grandeur hell?

Will someone please explain to me why these privileged college students are behaving like they’re corner boys from the 80s? I know the economy is in a recession but times ain’t NEVER that goddamn tough if you’re enrolled in freaking IVY LEAGUE University! Sheeeit.

But not for nothing, what’s really, really, really making my nerves bad is homegirl from Cornell’s mugshot. Yo. Why does her skin look like a damn biology class experiment gone all the way WRONG??

This chick has mad sores and open blisters all over her face. Uuggh. Makes me wanna grab a Sharpie and play connect the dots on her pockmarked face. And then her hair… JE-SUS.

*makes the sign of the cross*

No exaggeration, there’s so much grease I can smell it from here. I know it’s finals week but dammit, she couldn’t have taken a quick shower before she went to make that drop? No? Too much?

*gags violently*

Ya’ll brats better stop playing the reindeer games, turn off that damn Rick Ross and get your asses back to that study group. Dammit.

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