Mitzi Moments

Mitzi Moments

mo money, mo problems…

By on January 24, 2011 in desperate cry for help, made for the maury show, pocket full of dirty tissue

So Oprah’s got a half-sister, huh?


Lucky chick.

Cause I surely was sitting here hoping that the big announcement was that she discovered that she actually had a secret love child out and that it turned out to be ME. No offense mom.

Oh wells, so much for that crack pipe dream.

On another note, prayers up for all the victims of the terrorist attack at the Moscow airport and Holly Lahti, the 29 year-old single mom that won $190 million dollars in the Mega Millions jackpot about three weeks ago. Turns out homegirl had serious domestic violence issues with her sleazy, estranged husband (who put that nasty shiner on her left eye back in 2003 & also happens to be suing for a chunk of her winnings) and is now missing.

BLANK STARE

*makes the sign of the cross and starts tossing holy water every which way*

u and your 54 followers…

By on January 21, 2011 in i die, Mitzi- all day every day, never too grown, pocket full of dirty tissue

O-M-G! Just finished reading a story about a Sports Illustrated writer that decided to track down a couple of the people that left him extremely nasty, personal, online comments (including a picture of hard core porn) in response to an article he wrote. Check it out HERE.


HEE-LARIOUS.

Talking about, when the first guy answered the phone and realized it was the sports writer he had just cussed out and sent an x-rated picture- cause homeboy really did call both commenters on their home phones- it was an ENTIRELY different story than the crude, profanity filled tirades they had written online:

“Without invisibility or the support of his 54 Twitter followers or the superhuman powers supplied by a warm keyboard, Matt was meek and apologetic. ‘I was just trying to get a rise out of you,” he said. “You’re a known sports writer, and I thought it was cool. That’s all. I never meant for it to reach this point.'”

Or wait on it.. the one who still lives at home with his freaking mother:

“… along with contacting Matt, I also tracked down Andy, a 23-year-old aspiring writer who tweeted of me: “jeff Pearlman and billy madison share an intelligence quotient (because jeff Pearlman is a f—ing retard).”
When I dialed a number I found for Andy, his mother answered. (I admit, this brought me great delight.) Andy was even more apologetic than Matt…”

Uh huh, I’ll bet.

*falls out laughing*

Now don’t get me wrong, everyone is entitled to an opinion. And you’re absolutely free to comment on/disagree with any and everything I publish. (In fact, hearing a different side of the story makes me more informed.) So please share. But there’s a HUGE difference between disagreeing and calling names/sending pornographic images to illustrate your disdain.

DEAD FISH EYES

So lesson of the day for all the internet thugs runnin’ amuck & poppin’ ish from behind your new iPads: The keyboard will only protect you so far.

Lames.

do not pass go, do not collect a single dollar…

By on January 20, 2011 in desperate cry for help, it's not a game out there, made for the maury show, tapped out



For the record, I am adamantly pro-choice.

I have no interest or desire to regulate another woman’s reproductive decisions nor do I believe that it is anyone else’s right to do so.

Because at the end of the day, there’s only one person that will have to live with the mental and physical consequences of giving birth to an unwanted child. And it sure as hell ain’t nam one of the folks holding up graphic protest signs and blockading the entrance to abortion clinics.

With that said, I am absolutely horrified by the accusations against this doctor in Philadelphia. H-O-R-R-I-F-I-E-D.

Performing medical services in a filthy clinic that reeked of cat urine?
Abortions given during the 6th & 7th month of pregnancy?
Severing living babies’ spinal cords with scissors?
Hoarding bags of fetuses in a refrigerator?
Transferring venereal disease from patient to patient b/c the instruments weren’t sterilized?
Saving baby feet in jars for no known medical reason?

*gags violently*

This man wasn’t a medical practitioner, he was a freaking MONSTER.

And what makes is so devastating is that he clearly preyed on the weakest members of his very own community. Cause ain’t no way in the world, any woman with means and options would elect to have such a sensitive surgery in such a disgusting, demoralizing and offensive environment.

There’s a special place in hell for people who are part of ish like this. And certainly I hope that man, his wife (who was his partner in crime) and all the rest of the so called professionals in the office -receptionist, nurse, anesthetist, whoever was there- see fit to make their way there ASAP.

screwed up priorities…

By on January 19, 2011 in made for the maury show, pocket full of dirty tissue, tapped out

So I’m going to skip right over Regis’s retirement announcement, the 300 dead cows in Wisconsin and get to the important stuff: the bidding war over O.B tampons on Ebay!


*silence*

Okay, I kid, I kid. But don’t act like paying $79 for a box of tampons isn’t excessive.

Actually, a couple of stories caught my attention this morning as I was catching up from the long weekend hiatus: First, there’s the story about the Memphis high school where 90 teen girls are pregnant or have already given birth this school year. Uh, 90? All in 1 school? SMH. So much for abstinence, huh? Then there is the article on the Hepatitis C patient in Alaska who was charged with attempted murder for spitting on a nurse while she was trying to put him in restraints. Now, ya’ll already know how squeamish I am about germs & saliva… Can you imagine what this poor woman was thinking when ‘ole dude hocked a fat one in her mouth?? *shudders* But the most intriguing of all the headlines I stumbled across was the white guy who completely wilded out when his wife caught him watching porn. And when I say wilded out, I mean homeboy flew into a rage and straight stabbed her to death. Mmm-hmmm… But wait on it- after the murder, he proceeded to go to a basketball game and THEN call the police.

DEAD.

Like seriously? There are so many things wrong with this last story. First of all, why are married people still getting into arguements over porn? Its a video with actors. That he will never meet. Now, if it was a video of your next door neighbors or your kid’s 3rd grade teacher, that’s a little different. But some botox filled broad and bi-sexual man w a penile extension? So not worth the energy or worse, getting yourself killed over. At all.

And who in the trailer trash crazy goes to a basketball game before reporting a murder? For all that, he might as well not call at all. Just toss her ass in a garbage bag and keep it moving.

No offense.

Maybe I’m just tired this morning but the series of poor decisions in this situation is simply perplexing. Forreal.

now is the time to call 911…

By on January 14, 2011 in end of days, made for the maury show, why we as a people can't get ahead

It’s funny, because as a single woman, I’m frequented being asked what I look in a mate. And naturally, here are a lot of qualities that I hope that my life partner will possess. But after watching this video, I gotta tell you the order of that theoretical list IMMEDIATELY become revised and now has a non-negotiable number one:


SOCIALLY RESPONSIBLE.

YO, how in the WORLD does anyone in their right mind drive by an unsupervised toddler waddling down the sidewalk EVER???? And the baby was ONLY wearing a pair of diapers in the f’king SNOW???

BLANK STARE w/ MOUTH COMPLETELY AJAR

Ya’ll these dudes are beyond foul and selfish. And their sick, voyeuristic ability to enjoy witnessing what is clearly a cry of help and not get involved is just…

This is exactly what I meant when I say, as embarrassed as that pre-teen might have TEMPORARILY felt getting whupped up on by his Uncle, at LEAST somebody cared enough to jump in and get involved when he was endangering his life (And yes, posting pictures of yourself pretending to be a drug dealing gang member and making terrorist death treats on the internet where nothing ever disappears IS endangering your life).

This seriously reminds me of the type of people that stand around and video tape a woman being gang raped. But in that case, at least the cowards can claim that they might of been scared for their own safety. This is a BABY on a deserted street in a clearly blighted area of town.

I really hope all the men laughing in that car face criminal charges for their depraved indifference.

*drops the mic and walks away*

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