Mitzi Moments

Mitzi Moments

me,myself and i…

By on July 6, 2009 in cuteness kills, Mitzi- all day every day, pocket full of dirty tissue, why we as a people can't get ahead

So after debating back and forth for some time, a good friend of mine (who shall forever remain nameless) got this AMAZING but EXTREME haircut. Mind you, I’m not saying she is the only person in the whole world with the particular style but it’s def the first in her immediate circle of friends.  Which is always kinda hot, right?


Well don’t you know, not even a week and a half later one of her homegirls called her FROM the chair in the local beauty salon asking/telling her that she wanted the exact same hairstyle too (cause at the point that you’re i the chair, you’re so not asking). And wait on it… could my friend explain to her stylist how the cut was done??

Err-um, what in the-hand-rocks-the cradle-hell?

Yeah, yeah, yeah, I hear folks on the whole “imitation is the sincerest form of flattery” party line. BUT lemme tell you something… forreal, foreal? When it comes to MOST women (cause there are always the A-list celeb exceptions) that mantra does NOT, I repeat DOES NOT apply to three things: hair, handbag or shoes. Straight. Up.

And don’t try me on it. We are too grown.  I do not want to be surrounded by a circle of clones. Go get your own style, dammit. I can barely cobble mine together without you encroaching on my ish!

Survey says, LAME.

wrong on so many levels…

By on July 2, 2009 in desperate cry for help, i'm not ready to be a grandmother, made for the maury show, supermarket dreams on a bodega budget, tagging out, why we as a people can't get ahead

Err-um, why is Ruby (my neighbor’s bad ass miniature chihuahua) pregnant AGAIN?  

Like seriously? Not for nothing, all that runt does is bark her head off, pee on my doormat and get knocked up.  She’s like the four-legged welfare queen of my building.  It’s too much.

So anyhoo, I go over to offer my congrats on the impeding births. Cause you know, rule number 1000001 to surviving life in the hood: do not judge. If you don’t think four dogs ( 2 chihuahuas and 2 pitbulls) in one cramped two bedroom apt isn’t already a lot, so be it. Have at it. 

But wait on it… don’t you know this hooker is knocked up by her own son from the last litter, Brownie!?!?!

Ruby + Brownie= a little bit of vomit in my mouth right now.

Jesus be the ASPCA because yours truly is DONE.

may the GAP be with you…

By on July 1, 2009 in i die, keep hope alive, supermarket dreams on a bodega budget, using our powers for good

Random: so the other day I received an email from a unknown marketing company rep named Justine asking whether I’d be interested in becoming a Gap Brand Enthusiast. According to her email, somehow or another, they’d stumbled on my blog, enjoyed the tomfoolery and wanted to see if I was down to test out the new ‘Born To Fit’ line of GAP jeans before they hit the stores this fall for, wait on it… FREE.   


Oh please believe, I  just knew this was one of those African-money-laundering-pyramid schemes.  Not to mention that I haven’t comfortably fit into a pair of GAP jeans since I was in freaking college. But then I reconsidered and was like what the hell?  Nothing ventured, nothing gained, right?

Turns out that not only is this operation very legit but in addition to the jeans, if selected (of course there’s a whole process) not only will I get to try out the new jeans, but for the next year I’ll also get all the latest and greatest releases from GAP!!  

Err-umm free clothes for a year in the middle of a recession? Can the church get an amen???

Then wait on it… to sweeten the deal, Justine ends the meeting by taking me shopping for an outfit at the nearby GAP store!! I copped the most comfy summer weight cardigan (I’m actually wearing it in my profile photo), a great pair of linen trousers, a pretty gray sweater top that you will probably be seeing on TV sometime sooner or later and a silk tank top that’s gonna be hot to death with my white jeans. Mmm-hmmm, just like that.
 
So anyhoo, we shall see. I assume that they’ll be making their decision within the month. Fingers crossed… If nothing else, THANKS JUSTINE. This post is for you.

i made it…

By on June 30, 2009 in Mitzi- all day every day

Today is a good day. The sun is shining, my apartment is clean and guess what? It’s the 11th anniversary of my liver transplant. Mmm-hmmm, just like that.  After all the craziness, I’m still here making the magic happen.  It don’t get much better than that, I tell ya. 


So in honor of my special day, I’m going to do a little bit of work (just enough to keep the lights on), eat a really yummy breakfast, go sit in the sun with my dog and wait to see what other wonderful things will develop.

Have a fantastical day!

still waiting for usher to perform…

By on June 29, 2009 in desperate cry for help, end of days, honorary white woman, made for the maury show, why we as a people can't get ahead

I’d be wrong for not posting about the hot ass mess that was the BET Awards, wouldnt I?   


‘Cause I’d really rather not talk about the tomfoolery that snatched almost four hours of my life away and left me utterly depressed. On some- so this is what we’ve been reduced to, huh?

And it’s not even so much the whole T-Pain accepting his award with a red plastic cup in hand, ya girl Beyonce selfishly choosing to sing a lackluster Ave Maria instead of a MJ song when she’s probably one of only 4 people in the entire place that could’ve done it justice, Zoe Saladano’s no home-training having self announcing to the world that veteran actress/Star Trek icon Nichelle Nichols was delayed the show up because she was in the bathroom TWICE or even Ving Rhames violent crackhead-esque outburst.
 
Naw, it was the subtle screw-ups that made my nerves bad. 

Like, this many years in the game and your tech guys still can’t get the sound system situation together? Err-um, why in the world weren’t the nominees in the various categories named? Who the hell didn’t realize that Don Cornelius is a thousand years old and anticipate his obvious need for the size of letters on the telepromter to be EXTRA, EXTRA LARGE? And most disturbing- Where was the Michael jackson bio?? All the energy put into Jaime’s wardrobe changes and nobody realized that there wasn’t a complete career bio/ montage prepared? Sigh.  

Jesus take the wheel, ’cause I. Can’t.

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