Mitzi Moments

Author: Mitzi

no bible beating allowed…

By on April 13, 2010 in feedback

I had an interesting conversation about dating, marriage and religion with an old friend from college that I’ve recently reconnected with thanks the wonders of Facebook. Before I go in, let me give you a little background on dude- He is a good looking, intelligent, well traveled, African American in his early 30s that resides in Atlanta. With his wife and multiple kids- so, there’ll be none of that type of scandal in this post thank you very much.


Anyhoo, to quickly sum the exchange up: First, he spent what felt like 3 hours steady grilling me about who I was dating, all the potential I was wasting by dating what he deemed as the wrong types of guys, why I refuse to move to Atlanta and of course, why it was really my fault that I’m not married yet.

SIDEBAR: have you ever noticed how much ADVICE married people feel COMPELLED to give their single friends?? As if being single is such a TERRIBLE affliction. And since they’re no longer in the same boat, they just HAVE to help you get out too??

Then (when he finally paused to take a breath) I countered with: ‘Since you’re so confident there are HOARDS of overlooked eligible Black men out there restlessly waiting for me to get my life together and find them, why don’t you introduce me to a few? You know, kinda like, put your money where your mouth is?’

Well to what should be no one’s amazement, he immediately changed his tune.

His NEW song and dance became even shadier: while all of his single friends are intelligent, great looking, in their late early 30s, allegedly above & beyond eligible, and actively looking to get married in the near future; NONE are be willing to enter a serious relationship with a woman of a different faith. Mind you, when he said different, he wasn’t talking about a Christian to a Muslim or even Jehovah’s Witness to Jewish. Oh no. He was a specific as Protestant to Catholic. And since my faith lends itself more towards deeply committed spiritually than any conventional organized religions, he wouldn’t feel COMFORTABLE introducing me to any of his boys.

So much for all my potential, huh? *SIDE-EYE*

For the record, it has never in a million years occurred to me to disqualify a potential mate based on faith. Truth be told, I’ve even dated a guy who was so “religious” he felt the need to repent for his sins every time we had sex b/c I wasn’t “saved.” (Yeah, I wish I was making that up too.)

But back to the convo with ‘ole boy… So at the end of the morn (’cause for the record, his happily married behind called me at midnight) I still refused to believe that the majority of people that I know would agree with him and disqualify a potential mate because the individual was Protestant and he/she was Baptist. But it did make me wonder how many folks are as liberal minded as i am when it comes to marrying someone of a drastically different faith. So of course, I asked.

73% of you guys said you wouldn’t do it
26% of you said it wouldn’t matter

Interesting. I guess as folks get older and go through real life trials and tribulations, being specific about faith matters more… And I wish you all good luck with that. ‘Cause please believe, as long as a man is mature, open-minded and recognizes some kinda higher power the doors of MY church will remain what? WIDE open.

Let the choir sing.

guess the stove ain’t hot enuf…

By on April 13, 2010 in it's in the genes, pocket full of dirty tissue, tagging out

Well all righty then.


So I just finished reading the related articles about the Georgia DA’s decision not to pursue sexual assault charges against Pittsburgh Steeler quarterback Ben Roethlisberger. Hmm… Although I’m gonna assume that dude is innocent of these charges- especially since the alleged victim refuses to press criminal charges- I’m just so confused as to why in the WORLD would this man put himself in this position any DAMN way??? Following the random drunk chick into a Georgia bar bathroom? Really Ben???


DEAD FISH EYES

Professional athletes are a special brood I tell you….

keep ya enemies close…

By on April 12, 2010 in desperate cry for help, end of days, i die, keep hope alive, using our powers for good, work it white girl

I went to bed thinking that I was going to HAVE to write today’s post about the ridiculousness that is the new VH1 reality show, Basketball Wives. I mean, how can the show honestly say it offers an insider’s view of the trials & tribulations that accompany marriage to a high profile basketball player when only one of the six participants is married. And even more importantly, I don’t recognize her husband at ALL (shoot, there’s not even a wikipedia entry on dude).


BLANK STARE

Seems like the show should be described as an insider’s view of NBA bitterest baby mamas, ex-girlfriends, ex-fiancees and ex-wives. Cause it certainly looks like the game got the best of this group of women. I don’t care how much money or plastic surgery you have, it won’t ever disguise that run-thru / over-compromised appearance of woman whose been used up in her prime and discarded with zero respect. I’m just saying.

But THEN, I saw the CNN news story about the latest beef between the United States State Department and the Russia Government. Apparently Russia is threatening to shut down ALL adoptions to families in America not now but RIGHT NOW. Why you ask?

Well, apparently some random white couple in middle America decided that the 7-year old Russian kid they adopted was some type of violent psychopath. Talking about the little boy had a list of people that he wanted to hurt and number one on the list was his American mom.

WOAH

And so they what? Sent that little serial killer right back to the motherland all by his damn self. Mmm-hmm… just. like. that. But wait on it… Before putting him on the plane the adoptive father, Torry Hansen packed a one-sentence note in homeboy’s backpack talking about:
“I am sorry to say that for the safety of my family, friends and myself I no longer wish to parent this child.”

OMG, if this ain’t the damn storyline from Orphan, I don’t know what it is. SMH. Tell you what, I’ll take me a little knucklehead from the hood a million times over before I start searching for some damn foreign baby that can’t even say I hate you in English. No offense.

*starts tossing holy water like I’m popping champagne*

proper use of the word slut…

By on April 9, 2010 in desperate cry for help, keep hope alive, supermarket dreams on a bodega budget, tapped out, why we as a people can't get ahead

Well surprise, surprise, somehow my upstanding behind didn’t get selected for the month-long criminal case involving wire taps, cocaine, ecstacy and 2 Puerto Rican from the Dykeman Projects in the Bronx. BLANK STARE

Gee, I wonder if it had something to do with the judge’s question: do you know anyone that’s been convicted of a crime?

Anyhoo, while I’m holed up here on 100 Centre Street waiting for my last day of service to end, it looks like the state of marriage continues to rapidly deteriorate. Not only did lameass Tiki Barber leave his pregnant wife of 11 years for an intern but it seems Garcelle Beauvais-Nillion’s husband has also been outted for his five year affair. So how many celebrity husbands are in the shit house behind women probabaly not worth the gum on the bottom of my shoe: Steve Phillips, Tiger Woods, Shaq, Jesse James, Tiki Barber… Nice, very nice.

Keep it classy ya’ll.

But not for nothing, there’s been such a varied response to the cheating by all the wives. Don’t ya think? Let’s see, Steve Phillips wife sued him and homegirl, Elin chased Tiger’s ass with a golf club, Shawnee snatched kids and went to LA, Sandra straight disappeared, Giny Barber immediately started crying to the press and good ‘ole Garcelle… Well Ms. Thang sent a damn email to the ENTIRE talent agency where her husband works. Mmm-hmm, talking about:
“I found out today that MY husband of almost 9 yrs has been having an affair for 5 yrs with some slut in Chicago. I am devastated!!!! And I have been duped!! Our boys don’t deserve this!”

JUST LIKE THAT.

I gotta say, it’s been a bad run for unfaithful men over the past 7 months. And sure, I’d like to be optimistic about the situation. Cause you know, not everyone has to put his hand on the fire to figure out that it burns. But it’s just… I mean honestly? Interns, waitresses, low budget internet porn stars, party promoters and your homeboy’s fiancee? It’s a lot. Le sigh.

Jesus be the secret bank account in your mama’s maiden name.

one angry woman…

By on April 8, 2010 in end of days, it's not a game out there, keep hope alive

So for the record, this whole jet lag thing is NO joke. Not for nothing, I’m not necessarily working with a full deck until at least 10 o’clock in the morning. So please believe when I tell you that 8 am hasn’t felt this early since I was in college trying to make it to a Chemistry class the morning after an A Phi A jump-off…. But I digress.

Anyhoo, now add to to the muddled equation that for the next two days, I’ll be sitting for jury duty.

FAIL

Oh jeez, they’re calling us… Wish me luck!

spirit sucks anyway…

By on April 7, 2010 in end of days, it ain't easy, it's not a game out there, pocket full of dirty tissue

Here’s the thing- I understand that the rising prices of gasoline makes the cost of air travel ridiculous. So as much as I resent the idea, if I insist on checking a bag, then I simply suck it up and pony up the extra moolah. End of the story. But there is a limitation to the stupidity. And ladies and gentlemen, I do believe Spirit Airlines has jumped the shark.

According to Metro Newspaper, as of August 1st Spirit Airlines intends to charge passengers up to $45 for any carry-on luggage they store in the overhead compartments. No hun, you read that correctly- you can only bring one item that fits under your seat or you’re going to be charged an additional fee.

Oh and wait on it… when questioned about the new policy the smartass Chief Operating Officer of Spirit Ken McKenzie replied, “Bring less, pay less. It’s simple.”

BLANK STARE

Err-um Kenny boy, how about this – More fees, less passengers. That’s simple too.

Seriously? This is ridiculous. How often does the average person board a plane to go somewhere that only requires one change of clothes and a toothbrush? So what, now you’re going to have folks blocking access to the aisles because they’re trying to cram an overnight bag under the seat to save $50.

Boo, hiss, boo.

final boarding call…

By on April 5, 2010 in end of days, it's not a game out there, Mitzi- all day every day

Sooo I felt my first earthquake yesterday afternoon… well the aftershocks at least.

Gotta say, as much as I enjoy hanging out in LaLa Land, I’m not a fan. And despite the BFF assuring me that it wasn’t nearly as bad as it could’ve been, I was genuinely scared as hell when the windows and the walls started shaking. Oh and did I mention how long it lasted? Oh yeah, the walls didn’t just shake a little something and stop like I’ve always imagined. No sir, everything kept rockin’ for a good minute or so. Mm-hmm… Survey says no thank you.

But I will say, I was a true New Yorker about it. I didn’t scream, I didn’t run, I just got very, very quiet. In fact, all I did was ask Carla why the floor was suddenly moving under my feet. And as soon as she said, “Because we’re there’s an earthquake going on,” I immediately found my behind a seat on the couch and what? Shut the hell up til it was over. Matter of fact, I didn’t really start talking about an hour later when we finally left the apartment and were outside in the free and clear- ’cause I didn’t want to tempt the fates.

BLANK STARE

I know, I know, don’t judge me. But please believe that the kid will NOT be missing her flight home tomorrow.

worth the waste of time…

By on April 1, 2010 in keep hope alive, why we as a people can't get ahead

Well lookey here! Just when I was getting completely bored by all of my fave gossip blogs, the NYT has identified what they consider to be ‘The Rising Stars of Gossip Blogs.’

Ahh, praise the good Lord for the tools of procrastination!

Although it should come as no surprise that 9 out of 10 of the aforementioned blogs cater solely to mainstream celebs/ interests (read: what white people like and spend ridiculous amounts of free time wondering about). *side-eye* I’m still happy to have a couple of options to my tad bit tiresome DListed, Necole Bitchie and YBF line-up. No offense.

So I guess we shall see if any of these newcomers ultimately warm the blood like a good Crunk & Disorderly post… Or will my wandering mouse be right back to Bossip for the half-cocked tomfoolery.

go away…

By on March 31, 2010 in desperate cry for help, pocket full of dirty tissue, tapped out

So I just heard about the upcoming Vanity Fair feature story on the alledged mistresses of Tiger Woods….

CRICKETS

Yeah… Gotta be honest, not so sure this is a good look for VF. I’m just saying. It just feels way more than like an US Weekly exclusive than a full-length feature for such a great magazine. And not for nothing, I simply don’t want to hear anything else from a these trashy low-budget hookers.

Like when are their 15 minutes EVER going to be up??

It’s not like I’m suddenly going to feel badly for any of them. To the contrary, it only increases my disdain. For example, all of the women are chiming in on Tiger’s cheapness. One says, “All he ever bought me was a Subway sandwich,” another gripes that he flew her around in coach and the best is the one who he brought to his crib but never let her into the master bedroom.

BLANK STARE

Man, listen, every single one of ya’ll are idiots. Every other week, Tiger Woods is included on a new and improved list of the wealthiest athletes on the PLANET. So if all you got outta that situation was sex in the garage and a sandwich, that’s your freaking fault.

The End.

hometraining is so key…

By on March 29, 2010 in feedback

About a month ago, I read an article on Reuters about the significant rise of people in London preferring to use email and social networking web sites to break up with their partners. Mmm-hmmm…


Apparently, over 34 percent of the people polled admitted that they’d ended a relationship by email, 30% had simply changed their status on Facebook and wait on it… 6% of these e-thugs got extra gully and released the news unilaterally on Twitter. TWITTER???

DEAD

I am happy/ blessed to say that to date, I have NEVER had anyone end of relationship with me via email. Shoot, if you ask me over the phone is super shady let alone digitally. but I didn’t want to assume that just because I haven’t had the unpleasant experience, it wasn’t happening to my friends and peeps. So I put up the poll question- Have you ever dumped o been dumped via text message?

And guess what?

83% said never.
2% ended the relationship that way.
13% received notice via text.

BLANK STARE

While I’m relieved for the 83%, I cant believe this bullish has happened to 13% of us. What is the world coming to when folks can’t even sum up enough courage to look you in the eye and tell you the relationship is over? Yeah, I’m talking to the 2%. It’s not that damn hard. Seriously, unless your life is in danger, it’s the least. Even if you’re pissed off, there’s something very powerful about saying the words- This is Over… I don’t want to be with You… This Isn’t working for Me… Or my favoritest- So yeah, I’d rather not.

And yes, that includes the times I’ve been on the receiving end. Cause once I hear the words out of your mouth, there is instant clarity. Grand opening, grand closing.

What do you think?

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