Mitzi Moments

Mitzi Moments

the bottom of shoes worn once should never ever, ever look like this…

By on May 26, 2009 in it ain't easy, Mitzi- all day every day, using our powers for good

It’s official-  Toya & Dre’s Super Sexy Second Wedding is a wrap!  Free at last, free at last, thank God Almighty, I am free at last!  No more multiple dress fittings, late night invitation stuffing, frantic shoe shopping, last minute make-up appointments or drama-filled weather report watches to endure.  

Mr. & Mrs. Brown are safely in Thailand (making up for the 60 days of abstinence that crazy ass Toya insisted upon ‘to make it feel like the first time all over again’) and my feet are still soaking in a bucket of ice cold water (who knew it was humanly possible to stand/dance for 7.5 hours in a pair of 4 in stilettos?)
Oh and yes, with the help of a whole lot of prayer and sticky tape, the dress managed to stay up and over most of the boobs all night long. Ain’t God good? 

here comes the bride…

By on May 22, 2009 in cuteness kills, desperate cry for help, it takes a village, mama gotta eat, too old for the road

PRAISE God there are less than 48 hours until Toya & Dre’s freaking wedding!!!  My goodness, this whole bridesmaid dress situation has been a NIGHTMARE. Exhale. Got me feeling like a broke-down Keyshia Cole singing, ‘I jus’ want it to be OVAAAA!’  

No offense.
Forget the fact that I’ve been existing in a perpetual state of hunger for the last 6 weeks, why has it taken SIX freaking fittings to get a “custom-made” dress to fit properly?? Seriously?? , I’m a need you to do a little better dude.  Cause beyond the $250 for a dress that I won’t ever wear again, you’re wasting MY TIME.  
SIX times over the past EIGHT weeks, I’ve had to stop any and everything that I was doing and DRAG my ass down to midtown and below (because after the 4th attempt, it required a totally different tailor to execute the necessary damage control) from Washington Heights,.  For those who aren’t familiar with NYC, that’s about 120 blocks or a 40 min trip. Mind you, as I type this post the dress is not in hand. I still have to go pick it up for the shop.  Uh-huh, one word: beyond.
Jesus be the open bar reception.  ‘Cause Lord, I can’t do it in my right mind…

like nino at the carter…

By on May 20, 2009 in it's not a game out there, tagging out, why we as a people can't get ahead

Um, I’ll tell you where yours truly WON’T be going on vacation any time soon- Phoenix, AZ. Uh-huh, no thank you.  Not as long as the city is averaging ONE KIDNAPPING A DAY. Shiiiiiit. Can you imagine?

According to police reports, folks are being snatched out of their homes in broad daylight and tortured Hollywood style (they tried to cut one victim’s ear off, blowtorched his back and sodomized him with a pair of scissors) for some ransom money. Lord haf mercy.
The tricky part of the equation is that only a third, maybe less of the city’s kidnappings are reported because the cases are normally criminal-on-criminal.  The victims are generally smugglers, drug dealers or illegal immigrants. Sigh. Call me a punk but, I’d rather sit my ass in lockdown box for 25 years than have someone blowtorch my back.
But what makes my nerves bad are the senseless tragedies.  Like the 13-year old girl that was on her way to play basketball with a friend when she was mistaken for a drug dealer’s niece. Apparently, the kidnappers snatched her from the middle of a ‘quiet’ suburban neighborhood. Thankfully, she was eventually returned to her parents.  The report describes her as being relatively unharmed. Err-um, what the hell is “relatively unharmed”???
I’m telling you, it’s poppin’ off like the 80s out there.  Not fresh, at all party people.

blah, blah, blah…

By on May 19, 2009 in pocket full of dirty tissue, too old for the road, why we as a people can't get ahead

Maybe its just the mood that I’m in but, doesn’t it kinda seem like the celeb gossip blogs are EXTRA boring nowadays? 

Like seriously, I used to live for the insane and totally inappropriate photos on Perez Hilton, Dlisted, The YBF, Crunk & Disorderly, etc but now…. Not so much. 
First of all, its all too clear that certain Z-listers  (yes, I’m talking to you Christina Milian) will attend the opening of a damn tuna can just to have their picture taken on a red carpet.  Then, lemme ask you this- do you really give a damn what Kim Kardashian or Teairra Marie wore to go buy a cup of coffee this morning? Didn’t think so.  Realistically, how many times can a nipple slip, crotch shot, “mysteriously leaked” sex tape or private photo collection be remotely shocking? Yawn.
I guess I just wish celebs would go somewhere and WORK.  Um hello, we’re in a freaking recession. Shouldn’t you be in a studio or auditioning for a new TV show or something?

not red carpet ready…

By on May 18, 2009 in going to hell in a handbasket, made for the maury show, pocket full of dirty tissue, work it white girl

Hmmm… did anyone watch that documentary ‘Farrah’s Story’, aka the Farrah Fawcett Death Watch last Friday night? Anyone? Anyone?  Anyone?

Yeah, me neither. And it’s terrible, ’cause back in the day I used to L-O-V-E me some Charlie’s Angels.  But on the forreal, forreal, I can’t get  into the idea of watching someone with a terminal disease suffer to death. Been there done that, err-um no thank you.
Granted, I totally sympathize with the whole need to call attention to the lack of resources available to fighting colorectal/ anal cancer any way possible.  But have we as a people become so desensitized to tragedy and death that an angel has to puke her guts on the camera for folks to give two cents? 
Jesus be a bit a of home-training… just a little bit.

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