Mitzi Moments

Mitzi Moments

she ain’t even all that cute…

By on October 21, 2009 in pocket full of dirty tissue, too old for the road, why we as a people can't get ahead


DJ, cue the music because… Bom, bom, bom another one bites the dust. 

I swear, these old ass former athletes just can’t let it go…. Like of all the women in the world that are down for the discreet-two-consenting-adults get down, this fool managed to find and screw the crazy ass, unstable, young chick that would shamelessly stoop to the level of incessantly harassing his wife, then cyber stalking his 16 year-old son on Facebook AND wait on it… showing up at the CT manse with the nasty old school ‘Hi-my-name-is-Brooke- and-I’m-screwing-ya-man’ letter mentioning the ugly birthmark above his crotch. So 1987.

Mind you, according to good ‘ole Steve, he only slept with homegirl 3 times. Uh-yeah, right. Please feel free to insert the DEAD FISH EYES right… here.

It’s like, did we learn NOTHING from the Steve McNair tragedy?  Why in the middle-age-crisis hell is anyone still chasing these immature broads that have absolutely nothing to lose? Does the young vagina feel that much better??? Cause not for nothing… thanks to decrease in modern day morality and fluidity of sexuality I’m pretty confident most of that young stuff be pretty worn out nowadays.  But I digress…

Bottom line: Steve you suck.  You put your entire family, livelihood (did I mention ESPN has now suspended this fool for a week?) and reputation in jeopardy over a fling with a certified bird. 

Survey says no thank you.

good girl needs prayer

By on October 20, 2009 in end of days, it ain't easy, tagging out

So I ( like countless numbers of you guys, I’m sure) just listened to Russian Roulette, the new single from ya girl Rih-Rih’s upcoming untitled album for the first time.  Hmmmmm… how can I say this nicely?


This  right here is the kind of song, that makes folks on the edge feel like slitting their wrists, videotaping it and posting it on youtbe.com might be a very sexy thing to do. 

*Insert Dead Fish Eyes*

Like personally, I’d probably listen to this when I was in a funky mood and needed to force myself to cry so that I could get the hell over it or on repeat during those traumatic first 48 hours after a bad break-up.  But for damn sure, not in a club.  And while you’re at it, I’m not sure I even want to hear it on the radio too many times. 

Shooot,  life is hard enough without the suicide theme music.

walt don’t want no parts of this…

By on October 19, 2009 in desperate cry for help, it's in the genes, work it white girl

Lord GOD!  Is it just my imagination or is Lindsey Lohan’s face looking Ca-RAZY recently? 


No, seriously, ever since her massively failed fashion career launch at the Paris shows, homegirl has gone straight leather face- deep etched wrinkles in the brow, blistery looking lips that no lipstick can seem to hide and the perpetual 2+ bags under the bloodshot eyes. Real talk? Homegirl looks a walking hangover.

Hmmm, I wonder if she’s so broke that she can’t afford a make-up artist anymore…. ‘Cause I have to say, even at her bald-headed worst, I don’t remember Brit- Brit’s skin EVA-NEVA looking this tough. Do you?

so not impressed…

By on October 16, 2009 in pocket full of dirty tissue, why we as a people can't get ahead

Just when I thought it wasn’t possible for Sean ‘Puffy/ Puff/ P.Diddy/ Diddy’ Combs to get any more ridiculous… Apparently this fool was on 106 & Park screeching his way through one of those horrendous Dirty Money tracks and tossing fake money into the crowds and managed to throw away his own $20,000 diamond ring. Fool.

But wait on it… once he realized that he’d lost the ring, Mr. Combs had security shut down the entire studio. And they proceeded to frisk the entire studio audience of teens and students like a bunch of criminals. Really? So this is what you sign up for when you go to BET?

So not interested.

But forreal, forreal, here’s what I don’t understand- if you’re such a baller, why you gonna lock down and frisk folks? Shouldn’t all your jewelry be insured? And if not, shouldn’t you be able to just charge it to the game? Like my bad, next time I’ll be sure to purchase jewelry that fits me properly? Sigh.

Damn P.Dummy.

like xmas in october…

By on October 15, 2009 in using our powers for good

Now here’s some medical news that we can all get excited about: it seems that there’s a new and improved menstrual cramp medicine being tested that proactively targets the cause of the stomach pains rather than trying to ease the pain once they’re already in full effect. Woo Hoo! The medication, known as VA11913 and manufactured by the British company Vantia Therapeutic, will be tested over the next two months on a group of women that suffer from severe cramps. 


Fingers crossed the days of being doubled over are numbered…

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