Mitzi Moments

Mitzi Moments

check one off the bucket list…

By on November 5, 2009 in miracle on 169th street, Mitzi- all day every day, using our powers for good

Quick shout to my girl, Nicole for hooking a sista up with a ticket to Game 6 of the World Series last night. There are no words to express what an AMAZING experience it was to watch my favorite team in the entire UNIVERSE win their 27th Championship title in the new stadium. And to think, I didn’t even have to perform unspeakable sexual acts live on the Times Square Jumbo-tron for it…


Seriously ma? I owe you my first born.

All I can say is: WHO’S YOUR DADDY?

the madness…

By on November 5, 2009 in Mitzi- all day every day, pocket full of dirty tissue, tagging out

Note to my beloved agent: I know I promised that I would meet that godforsaken deadline you’ve given me. And I swear, I really, really meant to… But unfortunately, the world is going to hell in a hand basket and it makes it a bit difficult for me to come up with funny, entertaining things to write about. Don’t believe me? Check it out:


-A 14 year old teen just admitted killing his 4 year-old neighbor. Apparently, he sodomized, drowned and then stuffed the poor little kid in the dryer to keep folks from thinking he was a child molester. *Dead Fish Eyes*

- a 29 year-old incest survivor who is imprisoned for cutting off and boiling her father’s penis, is now taking cooking classes at Rikers. Seriously? I’m not saying ‘ole dude didn’t get what he deserved BUT I’m just a little unclear who would ever okay this chick being in anyone’s kitchen like, ever.

- The number of corpses found at the former US Marine turn serial rapist/ killer’s crib in Cleveland is up to ELEVEN. And apparently, they haven’t even started breaking down the walls of the home

-Oh and Mayor Mike Bloomberg was re-elected.

So the next time you call and I’m hiding under my bed. Don’t ask why.

curly cord and all…

By on November 4, 2009 in moment of silence, stressed the hell out, the internet is the devil, why we as a people can't get ahead

Lord haf mercy, I am struggling this morning….


First of all my tummy hurts. And we all know, there’s NOTHING worse than waking up with a stomach ache when you have work to do.

But bigger than the bubble guts, why is my BlackBerry suddenly not charging??? WTF? 24 hours ago, the stoopid thing was absolutely fine and now, for no good goddamn reason, it’s not connecting with the charger. Straight dead battery…

AAARRRRGGGH, I hate all this fickle ass technology!

Seriously? The mere thought of the hours that I ‘m about to waste at the ghetto ass Sprint store on 125th Street when my ass should be trying to earn a living makes my stomach cramp up even more.

Jesus be a robin’s egg blue colored rotary phone…

feel it in the air…

By on November 3, 2009 in it's not a game out there, pocket full of dirty tissue, that sense of entitlement

WOW, so now actor Nicholas Cage is broke too? Damn homie, didn’t you make over $40 million in one year? SMH. I don’t know party people, seems to me like this recession is kicking every damn body’s arse nowadays. Poor thang.


Speaking of poor thangs… What about Wendy William’s former sidekick turn solo morning show radio personality Charlamagne getting fired ’cause he allowed Beanie Sigel to air Jay-Z out?? Woah. Lemme find out Sean Carter can’t take a little criticism. Not for nothing Mr. Knowles, with all the other stuff going on in your life, you really shouldn’t be so thin-skinned. And if you ain’t bother sending ya mans/ former BFF a measly nickel or even a single word of encouragement when he was on lockdown, so be it. That’s just who you are. Claim it and move on.

Oh and here’s the million dollar question of the day: Does anyone really, really think we’re going to get anything interesting out of Rih-Rih when she sits down with Diane on GMA? Or even 20/20?

makes me wanna listen to a love song…

By on November 2, 2009 in Mitzi- all day every day

Not to be all mushy on a Monday morning but I so HEART the Obamas.


Not only because they are the most dynamic and open-minded presidential couple we’ve had in the White House, like ever. No, simply because they’re so willing to be honest about what being part of such a dynamic union requires:

“If my ups and downs, our ups and downs in our marriage can help young couples sort of realize that good marriages take work. . . .” The image of a flawless relationship is “the last thing that we want to project. It’s unfair to the institution of marriage, and it’s unfair for young people who are trying to build something, to project this perfection that doesn’t exist.” -Michelle Obama

I just finished reading ‘The Obama’s Marriage’ this week’s NYT Magazine’s 10- page cover story on the President and the First Lady. Long? Um, hell yeah. But oh-so so inspirational for those of us still looking for our own version of happily ever after.

Onward my friends.

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