Category: Uncategorized

It’s official- we are getting old. And yes, I said WE.

42% of the folks can’t remember the last time the magic happened in a public place. Can you imagine if I’d asked this question say… five years ago? I’m willing to bet 42% would’ve chosen the “this week” option (and yes, I’m including myself in that). Sigh, so sad.
Of course, the mature part of my mind wants to rationalize the change in direction as a positive thing. “Oh, it’s because nowadys most of us have our own homes with expensive beds-sans parents-so we don’t have to act up in public places AND not for nothing, have you seen how disgusting bathrooms in the clubs are nowadays??? Hooking up in public is so dead.” But then…. the little voice in my head whispers, “Yeah right. That’s just a politically correct excuse for being less spontaneous. Ain’t nothing wrong with a little act up every now and then. You and your crew (well almost all of my crew) are just actin’ like old biddies.”

The reality is, if 25% of you guys were able to figure it out at some point in 2008, then the movement can’t be completely over, right?

So hats off to the 5% who were able to make the magic happen this past month. I just hope that it wasn’t on a park bench, playground swing, bathroom stall or backseat of a car that I’ll be on anytime soon.

And as for the 25% who have never, ever, ever… God bless your hearts. Elsa is probably disowning me and recruiting a new eldest daughter after reading this post. Hee hee. Feel free to submit your applications.

So funny, back in the day I was right there with the 20% of the folks bringing home every new person that they were dating within the first 3 months. Seemed like every Juan, Rick and Lamar rolled into Elsa’s crib to say hello and give her a chance to lay eyes on them. But I had to cut that little habit out quick fast and in a hurry when my dearly beloved mother started unapologetically mixing up names, talking ’bout, “But Mitzi, you bring so many. How am I supposed to know?” Jesus.

So nowadays, like 45% of you, I’m all about the 6 months waiting period. That gives the boy just enough time to ditch the perfect ‘representative’ that shows up to wine and dine you for the first 3-5 months of the relationship (you know the period when he’s absolutely perfect until he gets comfortable) and Elsa just enough time to forget the ex’s name.

How-some-ever, as I get older, I swing more and more towards the more secretive side of the pendulum. And like the 25%, I’m starting to believe that there’s no need for anyone new to meet my people until after a year. Cause really, it’s hard out here. And hearing my mom tell me that there’s “something she doesn’t trust” about every single guy I bring around can be a little frustrating. It’s like, damn Elsa can’t you like anybody??

But there is a limitation to the stupidity. And I don’t know about the 10% of you who are waiting until there’s a ring. What if the person turns out to be a long lost relative or something? So now you’re kissing cousins? That’s so coal miner’s daughter… Or worse, the creep who’ll steal all our money and jilt you at the alter? Had your mom seen him/ her earlier, they probably could’ve foreseen all that. ‘Cause you know parents are ALWAYS right.

and considered this is a valid excuse to book a fly hotel suite, get her friends twisted on liquor and cupcakes and then flash her thigh in my pictures… And you know what? I concur. Thanks Shorty Rock!
But on a more serious note, does another girlfriend turning the big 3-0 mean I’m really an adult? ‘Cause not for nothing, I’m nowhere near having the meaning of life figured out and firmly believe in calling my mom at least twice a day for answers. And it seems like every time I turn around another friend is turning 30+, getting married or-gasp- getting knocked up. Am I the only one who feels super pressused to pull it together?
Speaking of getting my life together, I should probably mention that I’m currently featured as a talking head in BET’s ‘Top 25 Celbrity Break-Ups’. And I say this only b/c folks are always yelling at me for not keeping them updated on the latest and greatest in my work life. So there you have it, I’m on BET spewing ‘ish about celeb break-ups (which is super ironic for reasons that will remain unsaid- you do the math).
DISCLOSURE: not really sure what had happened with my hair but I do love the way my make-up and outfit look onscreen. The twins were working the usual magic in the v-neck Malandrino knit dress… LOL.



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