Question- do Black people really date? Oh yeah? I don;t know, I’m not always convinced…

I vividly remember back in the day when I lived in CT and attended a primarily white school. Any number of my female white classmates, would go out of these mythical “dates” with a Tom on Friday, meet-up with Dick after the hockey game on Sat and then study with Harry on Wednesday. And wonders of all wonders, everyone knew about it on Monday. But none of the three guys was remotely upset or even called her a slut-bag because she was what? DATING. And god bless her heart, she wasn’t required to be exclusive and chose to see as many guys as a weekend could hold.

Now take that same scenerio amongst the African -American students. Let’s say Shaniqua kicked with Tyrone on Friday, hung out with DaQuan at the roller rink on Sat and met up with Marcell on Sunday after church. And same way, by Monday morning everyone would know. BUT, in this case the ENTIRE school would be calling her a two-bit trick. By the Monday afternoon, Tyrone would’ve beat Daquan ass and gotten suspended for two weeks. Then after the final bell rang, Marcell’s two sisters (that went to the other high school across town for juvenile deliquents) would’ve arrived to cuss poor Shaniqua out for trying to be cute and playing their baby brother out.

Laugh all you want, you know I’m right.

So now fast forward a bit and tell me this… is it because of the aforementioned unspoken but widely accepted black dating rule that the majority of us are conditioned to deal with only one person at a time? And more depressingly, even as supossedly mature adults we continue to behave like we OWN (lock, stock and shackled) every person we’ve ever dated years after the break-up?

It must be. Cause this the ONLY rational reason that I can conjur up with to explain why 60% of you would get pissed off if a JUMP-OFF decided to seriously date your friend.

Forreal, forreal? That wasn’t your soulmate… that’s an individual that you had sex with during creep hours. You know, the one that you wouldn’t bother to call because a simple ‘What’s good?’ text was more than enough to get the party started. Mmm-hmmm. So then tell me, how in the world do you earn the right to feel aways because they genuinely like your friend and want to date her/him? Uh-uh save your breath. I don’t care how you wanna spin it, you’re a hater.

Or maybe I grew up around too many pinktoes… Because I’m so with the 39% who could give a crap what a booty buddy does after I’m finished with the situation. I’ve have always believed in the throwaway theory- one woman’s trash is another woman’s treasure. There is no need to hoard any of the eligible jump-offs in the world. If he’s worth the trip across town, you really only need one at a time anyway.

Besides, I’m too busy trying to meet my Mr. Right. With any luck, dating you will keep that fool from texting me again. Okay?

I promise you, I have some of the BESTEST ex-boyfriends in the world. Like I always say, as soon I end a relationship, shit just comes together for the dude. Out of nowhere they all transform into these intelligent, caring, mature MEN. You know, the great guys who are always willing to lend a hand or listen when you need to vent? Suddenly, they want to share and confide. Mind you, wasn’t nary of this generousity or openess in effect during the time we were officially ‘girlfriend and boyfriend.’ But you know why, right? Keyword: END.

Alot of my poll questions come directly from conversations with friends (yes, we probably spend a lot more time than necessary talking about sex and the politics of sex). But then there are some questions that come straight out of the inappropriate/ politically incorrect corner in my mind. I’ll admit, the question, “Do you remember everyone that you’ve ever had sex with?” came out of the corner.